Lying to Yourself Works Sometimes

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Ah, sweet Procrastination. The curse cast on every student in the education system, both young and old. Why do today what you can do tomorrow? I have not yet heard of any legendary heroes escaping the curse fully. Is there one set way to break it? I highly doubt it. However, I may have found a way that can at least keep it at bay for as long as needed. What is this magical method you speak of, you ask? It’s very simple: the Illusion of Productivity.

To create this magical and wondrous Illusion of Productivity I speak of, you will need a few arms to take with you to battle. I’m talking about notebooks you like so much you almost don’t want to use them, pens which you love to write with, highlighters, sticky notes in all colours and sizes available, and a nice agenda or planner to keep track of everything. With this weaponry close to you, you will at least feel confident enough to defeat the evil that is Procrastination, and that feeling might just give you the boost you need to actually do so.

Secondly, you have to move to an appropriate battlefield. Would you want to fight a war in your very own bedroom? You might as well invite the enemy in for some tea. No, to defeat Procrastination, you have to move to a place where you have an advantage: the library, for example, or a classroom available for studying. These rooms will likely be filled with fellow soldiers battling Procrastination, so by being around them you have no choice but to join in on the battle. Again, you are one step closer to defeating the evil monster.

Last but not least, intimidate the bastard. The key is to make sure that Procrastination thinks it cannot get a hold of you. Show it your sick moves in making pretty summaries, writing down understandable schemes and making as many exercises as you can. Procrastination is not very smart, so as long as you at the very least pretend you are fighting, it should stay at bay. Go on and fight for a good fifty minutes, then stop fighting for about ten, and just when Procrastination thinks it can get to you, strike back hard.

Just remember that in the end, fighting is a skill you have to learn, and not one that will just come to you easily. No war was ever won without intense effort. Just keep on pretending, and eventually you will get the hang of it. You can do this. You are a warrior. You were born to conquer. You are strong, you are fierce, and you are awesome. You will not let Procrastination win. You will not let it take a hold of you. You will behead the bastard.

  • L. Parole

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